NomadicScribe.net

It’s been three weeks, and I finally feel ready to post this. It’s been a long time in coming, but I hope the time and effort shows. About Lost Valley…

HEART OF NOW
Wow. What can happen in the span of two weeks. Let’s start at the end, since it’s freshest in my mind. Lost Valley runs this workshop called the Heart of Now. It goes from Friday night to Monday afternoon. In one sense, it is about being present with yourself - being consciously aware of your body sensations and reactions, your emotions and emotional reactions, and your thoughts and mental reactions. As we become more aware of how our body, heart and mind reacts to certain situations, we are able to discover “automatic” reactions or patterned behavior which may or may not be serving us. One of the central themes of the workshop is choices - being conscious of our choices, and realizing we have made certain choices in the past because they served us at that time (sometimes to protect us). Once we are aware of those choices, we can make different choices, if we want to, if we decide that the old choices are no longer serving us. By looking at each person’s actions as a series of choices like this, we can remove the judgement of a choice being good or bad (and by extension, the person being good or bad), and look simply at the effects of those choices. The implicit understanding is that people are human, and they do what human beings do.

The environment created at Heart of Now is one of the key components. There are more “assistants” than “students.” Assistants are people who have already completed the course as students and are returning to help in supporting roles. The assistants are there to offer whatever support may be needed - a hand to hold or just someone to listen. People work through a lot of emotional things during the weekend; sometimes things they have been carrying around for a while, sometimes things they didn’t even know they had. It’s a place that you can cry or yell or do whatever it is you need to do to work through your baggage, to try and come to a more complete place. Heart of Now shares a lot of intention with the Re-evaluation Counseling (RC) that April and I took a class for. In RC, the goal is to allow each person to come up with a novel, accurate response to every situation. “Accurate” in this sense means a response based on the factors in the current situation, and not an automatic or defensive reaction based on past emotional experiences or associations.

One of the refreshing elements is the tenant that touch is a normal human need, and does not have to be tied to sexuality. This allows people to ask for and receive touch without shame and without association. Hugs, hands to hold, and cuddles are always within arm’s reach.
I will share my own experience with Heart of Now in another post. I want to keep this one focused on Lost Valley.

THE LOST VALLEY VIBE
Heart of Now is very much a basis for interpersonal relationships at Lost Valley - everyone’s taken it, or does soon after they arrive (it happens several times a year). People will often break off from the main group to talk through issues. Whatever support you need will be there if only you ask for it. In business meetings, they have a time keeper, and a vibes keeper. The time keeper keeps track of how long each issue is discussed so that the meeting doesn’t run too long. The vibes keeper monitors the “vibe” of the meeting and if anyone is getting emotionally charged over an issue, they call it out so that the emotional issue can be worked through, along with the business issue.

We got to see the “vibes” keeper in action during one of the business meetings. The community was deciding whether or not to host a conference by a particular group. While discussing the issue, the vibes keeper noticed two people reacting emotionally. Once “vibes” were called, the facilitator asked the two members to work through their emotional reactions before proceeding with the business issue. One influential member of the community had personal ties to the group. Because of this, another community member felt pressured to accommodate the group in spite of apparent financial concerns. People had expectations and understandings based on miscommunications and false assumptions. Once these factors were identified and discussed, the business issue could be discussed without anyone feeling personally attacked. Everyone stayed focused on their own emotional feelings & reactions. By the next day, the two members were communicating without tension, working out what had led to the situation the night before and how it could be resolved.

HOW DECISIONS ARE MADE AT LOST VALLEY
On Wednesday afternoon from 4:30 to 6:00, the community gathers for a Purpose Circle. This serves as their weekly business meeting. People can write up proposals to submit to the community. There is a smaller “Core” group which meets on Tuesday morning to review all the proposals and filter out the simpler ones, so the whole community doesn’t have to discuss every proposal. The Core Group members also participate in the Purpose Circle and new members are selected on a volunteer basis when they are needed. The Core Group’s recommendations are read at the beginning of the purpose circle, and if any community member wants to discuss an issue further, it will be bumped to the agenda for the meeting. The Purpose Circle includes announcements, a financial review, upcoming conferences, housing issues, kitchen issues, and other proposals. Decisions are made through consensus, so proposals are discussed until everyone is satisfied. They can be approved by a thumbs-up from all community members, or a sub-committee can be created with the power to make a decision.
Examples of proposals we heard were:
* reimburse Alex $30 or half of her utility bill, whichever is greater, for the time that community members and guests of LV stayed there while she was traveling.
* use LV funds to purchase meat and cheese - develop guidelines for meat to be purchased with personal funds and served on the community table (the LV kitchen is legally vegetarian).

JOB STRUCTURE
Each person within the community has a regular job/role that they serve - kitchen coordinator, garden coordinator, financial officer, land steward, etc. Some of those positions are full-time (30 hours/week), and some are half-time, based on the community’s need. So some members have two half-time jobs. In addition, each community member must put in 10 hours a week in community chores, which will include either one cooking or two cleaning shifts (after meals). The Lost Valley Educational Center non-profit organization owns the land, employs the staff, and rents housing facilities to each member. One of LVEC’s goals is to create a separate non-profit entity which will allow community members to accrue equity through their rent payments and labor efforts.

As work traders, April and I were required to work 6 hours a day, or 5 hours and $5, in exchange for room and board. Any community meetings we attended and community chores like cooking and cleaning all counted towards that requirement. The work we did varied quite a bit, depending on current needs. At breakfast every morning, we asked people who needed help and planned our day accordingly. We spent some time most days scrubbing and painting rebar to be used for signs on nature trails. We took care of kids and helped with various permaculture / landscaping projects, like clearing branches from trails between the cabins and dorms, or trimming sword-ferns for use in decorative centerpieces and for mulch. We each did some cooking and cleaning shifts. We also participated in the weekly “cleansing and creation” work party on Thursday mornings. In the work party, people divide up into small groups for 2 hours and help clean the common areas and do other odd jobs. The last week we were there, I got up every day at 6am. One of my jobs was to start a fire in the yurt where the Community Experience Week group met for presentations, so that it would be warm(er) by the time they got there at 9am. Getting up early for something I loved doing was so different from getting up early (even at 9) to do something I didn’t care about (i.e. going to work). It was so easy.

LIFE AT LOST VALLEY
Everyone has their own space at Lost Valley. Larger families with kids live in the Solplex, which has six individual apartments, each with it’s own plumbing. In addition, there are half a dozen cabins scattered around the grounds and several yurts have been installed. Most of these buildings were already present on the land at the time it was purchased, so they are not green/naturally built. The efficiency of the existing buildings is being improved, and all new construction will be of a more green/natural variety. As far as I know, all the buildings had electricity, and for buildings without plumbing there were several options for bathrooms/showers.

Many nights after dinner, people would jam out with guitars and/or hand drums, singing on the couches in the lodge next to the wood stove. They also had quite a library of board games, and chess matches were not uncommon. There were also VHS/DVD facilities available for general use and in some private cabins. We were lucky enough to be able to take advantage of the open-air hot tub, heated by a wood-burning stove. Hot-tubbing in the cool night air, serenaded by crickets and frogs. Awesome. There is a stereo in the lodge which can play different music in the lodge and in the kitchen. It provides great motivation when cleaning up after a meal. One night, we had an impromptu dance party in the kitchen. We even came up with appropriate dance moves like “sweeping the floor,” “hanging the pot,” and “wiping the table.” Some people have cars, so activities in Eugene (20 miles away) are not uncommon, including restaurants and movies. Some community members also have significant others in Eugene or Portland. However, off-grounds entertainment is the exception rather than the norm.

FOOD
Every meal was like eating at Casa de Luz (warning: music) - mostly organic, mostly vegan, beautiful, lovingly prepared by real people, and delicious! Many times I noticed enticing smells wafting out of the kitchen. Throughout the week, most meals are prepared for the community to eat together. Everyone is on their own for breakfast in terms of food preparation and cleanup, but many people take turns cooking for each other. Friday night, Saturday and Sunday meals are usually not prepared just for the community. If there is a group coming in for a weekend retreat or a conference, then community members can eat after the (paying) conference attendees have gone through the line. It has now been 3 weeks since we ate at Lost Valley and while I miss the awesome stews, greens and whole grains, the thing I miss most is having salad with every meal (and fixins!).

PEOPLE
Everyone was really helpful and welcoming. I felt very accepted and didn’t feel judged at all. People seemed to be grateful to have our help. One person mentioned a lesson she learned living at Lost Valley - not to get attached to people. With all the conferences, interns, work-traders and other people who stay at LVEC on a temporary basis, it’s difficult not to get attached. In spite of this, I felt very welcomed by everyone. We hung out with the interns a lot, because they were closer to our age range (20’s) - Madison, Susan, Polly and Cynthia. Karen helped us get out to LVEC in the first place (and shook her booty at the dance party in the kitchen!). Kaseja officially sponsored our two-weeks of work-trade and she and Ming-San made an extra effort to be available and help us with any questions or difficulties we had. I want to give shout-outs to the whole crew at LVEC - Dianne, Chris’s G. and R., Joe, Caroline, Alex, Keli, Dave, Gennevive, Stuart, Kim, Scott, Sam, Marc, Rick, Beth, Marty, Ming-San, all the young-uns and the kids, and anyone else who I’ve forgotten to include here. Thank you all for letting us share your home.

LOST VALLEY AS A WHOLE
In the two weeks that we spent at Lost Valley Educational Center, I saw the amazing integration of a business, housing co-op, and land management project. The efforts are focused by a common mission statement, which provides a clear guiding vision. Planning and visioning happens every year in the fall, to prepare for the next year. We saw a grid they had created last year which listed all the “departments” along the left side, and a calendar along the top - to plot goals & timeframes for various areas at different times of the year. We also saw an “energy flow” diagram which showed how the different departments interrelate & services they provide to each other. Without this, one might tend to think of a department as separate and allocate resources accordingly, but if it affects others areas and contributes to many facets of life and work, it may be worth a greater investment.
The three next-step goals that LVEC has are:
1) Create a land trust so that the 87 acres that LVEC sits on will be protected into the future, regardless of the fate of LVEC itself.
2) Create a separate legal entity for the housing co-op which will encourage other income/business opportunities not strictly outlined by the LVEC charter, and allow community members to gain equity or security in exchange for their efforts and inputs at Lost Valley.
3) Create a site plan for future construction of housing and community areas.

I asked Rick, the land development coordinator, what his proudest permaculture accomplishment was. I was expecting him to describe some intense construction which combined land use, benefit for people, wildlife habitat, and other permaculture principles. Maybe a wetland construction, or the solar-heated showers. His answer surprised me: “survival.” I asked him to explain and he said “look at those trees - when I started working here, they were half as high. That garden over there wasn’t planted yet, this wasn’t here,” etc. And as I thought about it - I realized that he was right. It has been 17 years since the Lost Valley Educational Center was started, and they are still here. They are more than just “here,” they are a strongly-knit community of people who are working together, living more sustainably every day, and sharing their knowledge and love with the world. Don’t discount continuation. For a place like this, it doesn’t just happen on it’s own.

Lost Valley felt like a place I could call home. Just knowing that a place like that exists is enough to inspire hope in me. It is definitely a place I want to come back to at some point. I could easily see myself living there for several years, although maybe not as a permanent residence (not while it’s in the U.S.!). During our stay, several people said things like “you guys fit in here so well,” which gives me a warm tingly sensation in my belly. In some ways, it feels like part of this trip is for them. Lost Valley has set the bar high for other communities in our future. We could not have chosen a better community for our first visit.

I encourage any Lost Valley community members to add comments (you’ll need to create a logon account first) to this post with any additional information they want to add, or to contact me directly if I have any errors.

In Tucson, our check engine light came on again. I put April in charge this time and she called around to several recommended mechanics in town and at least one of them said that on older (’92) vehicles, the check engine light doesn’t really check very much, and that it’s okay to ignore it. (We followed his advice and the light went off 2 days later).

Apparently the FAT is corrupted (I/O error when reading) on my external hard drive, which contains all of my music, partially-completed projects, old photographs, and other stuff that I won’t know is missing until I really need it.

I noticed the windshield washer reservoir is missing from my car. I called the last garage that worked on the car and while they did not admit to having left it out of my car, they did say that they had a few in the back and I was welcome to come and pick one up. Of course by this time we are several hundred miles away and are not planning on going back to L.A. any time soon. The mechanic helpfully said that I could get one at a salvage yard for $10-15.

My camera stopped working. I can still review pictures on the card, but it won’t take new pictures and the lens seems to be jammed in one position (won’t even close when the camera is turned off). I’ll probably need to send it into Sony and who knows how long that’ll take or how much it’ll cost me. (For my part, I did drop it on the beach at Nehalem Bay, but I cleaned it thoroughly and it had been doing fine since then, until now).

And to top it all off, I got pulled over (for “driving too close to the car in front of me”) when we were about 100 miles from our campsite for the weekend.

Did it seem like I was having too good a time out here?

We’re in the middle of a middle-american dream here at Finger Lakes S.P., Missouri. Everyone here has at least two of the following: an RV, a huge multi-room tent, an ATV, or a dirt bike. The days are loud here with the rumble of bikes and the early drunken laughter of adults who’ve started the beer marathon at noon today. The nights echoe with occational outbursts from adult and child alike, and the smell of meat burning on gasoline lit wood fires at nearly every camp. When I look to my left there are lights from Rvs and fires on one side of the road while the other side of the road looks pitch, only the siluettes of the trees over the darkness about 20 feet up, reaching for the glowing brick colored sky. That twenty foot high eighty foot long patch of mystery is a tickle in my concentration, all except it’s one presence. A single tire rim catches the light of a neiboring fire and flickers it’s signal to me from the unknown; some ancient symbol forged with fire heading it’s warning. I watch the fiery wheel and momentarily try to express a thought dislocated from it’s presence.
We were pulled over today and almost spent our evening in jail instead of being eaten by mosquitos feeling the taste of freedom.

It’s such a strange and overwhelming feeling to sit in a perfect balance of emotions, bliss and desire. I would never think of myself to someone who would describe a breeze as delicious, but I guess that’s because I hadn’t met it yet. There I was in our tent awaken by a single bird’s song and rose from my tent to be enshrouded by a delicious wind.
We’re again camping by a lake, but this time it’s a huge lake. The sun is reflecting off the water. It’s so bright it’s hard to look, but I do. I’m home sick. Being by a lake makes me want to be by THE lake. Waking up every morning like this, to a gentle wind coming in from the mountain and to the lake waters that are my lullaby at night, rocking me to sleep and my playmate by day stirring me out of bed with excitement.
We’re finally experiencing spring. With a spotty March (and half of April) going from cold to hot then cold again (CA, Tucson, then Flagstaff… different versions of spring that clashed and through us off) we’re finally here. A kansas spring is delicate and smooth. It’s heaven in the morning and close to dusk and a little warm throughout the day. There are dandelions and shepard’s purse blooming everywhere. Now I know where to go to make dandelion wine.
Today should be the last sprint of driving, then we’ll be close enough to Dancing Rabbit to relax and enjoy a couple nights in the tent.

We got to Lighthouse Park at sunset:

Benjamin’s pilgrimage to the Adbusters HQ

We saw our first cupcake store in Vancouver:

April looking cute

April on English Beach

After the first night, everything was covered in snow.

Good thing our tent was protected by some extra tarps.

The view from our campsite after the first day of snow

At night (and in the early morning), the water crept right up next to the campsite.
Other views from our campsite:

Kurt Cobain’s House

April writes her own message of adoration to the deceased. This park is in a small lot next to the house.

We’re on the road again. Back in a more traditional outdoors nomadic mode. We’re on our way to Dancing Rabbit Community in Missouri, which was approximately 1400 miles from where we were about two days ago in Flagstaff, AZ. Today we traveled about 450 miles, arriving here at Meade Lake State Park in Kansas.
Our tent was erected 11 feet from the water today at dusk on ground that was so dry my stake when hammered in made a long crack that shot out a foot from the injury. I imagined ants nearby screaming and whaling as the ground opened up and swallowed them whole. We sat for a while to feed our eyes as the moon rose vibrant red (a blood moon I call it) over the lake and slowly went pale and shrunk as it gained momentum and brilliance. The trees gave a slight rustle as the wind began to pick up from the west and the lake gulped occationally with restless fish striking the surface. Our little piece of paradise was temporary. It wasn’t long before neighboring good ol’ boys starting blaring “Sweet home Alabama.” It seemed to me to be the dinner bell, and to Benjamin probably a taste of reality to snap him out of his trance.
We finally finished off the stew I had made at Tami’s house last Tuesday. We both comment on the taste of vinegar and hope we were just in time and not on our way to the sickhouse. I think our stomachs will be tough as rocks when this trip is over. It’s been a constant struggle balancing the lack of money, lack of ice and lack of room with the need to eat. It’s a tough juggle and sometimes we eat tangy stew or fermented rice due to it (fermented rice shouldn’t make us sick we’ve been told, fyi).
Looking through the remains of our food supply from Tucson’s spree we figured out that the Trader Joe’s Truffles had melted again and spilled. This was the beginning of an improntu concoction of chocolate surprise.
Happy Camper Chocolate Surprise:

Melted chocolate truffles mixed with
Peanut butter (crunchy) spread over
The last two pieces of wheat bread sprinkled with
Granola (donated by friend, Laura) and
Dried blueberries (also donated by Laura)
Mmmmmm…

Now we have to shower off the layer of desert sun and dirt left on our skins, and lay down to the view from inside our tent. This will be the first clear night we sleep without the rainfly on. I’m looking forward to watching the sky change as I nuzzle in and out of sleep. This is one thing I have waited very patiently to enjoy, and one thing I know I’ll never have as a settled American inside constricting walls.

It’s been challenging to articulately compose my reaction to Lost Valley. There are too many things running around in my head about the land, the gracious sense of the place and the people who make it that way. I’ve made several attempts so far just to go silent with a smile. As pleasant (and maybe a bit sentimental) as that may be, it’s of no use to a reader.

I came to Lost Valley with a certain expectation as to what it had to offer me and was taken back at what I actually took with me. I came with a technical curiousity and a more scientific desire for answers.

How does this place run? Where are they at in the path to self-sufficiency? What resources (electricity, water, food, soil, ect) are still being consumed? What effect does it have on social/economic/political issues?

These questions, this research, was my early motivation.

Once I became open to what else was going on, I started to see the more subtle attraction to the lives these people lived. Having a community to hold you and to care for gave a depth to the care of the land and seemed to soothe this deep loneliness I’ve been carrying with me throughout this human life of mine. With your meals you’re served a diversity of affection. Like the massai people children were watched over and loved by the whole community. It was like a chosen extended family that made room for roles that have no name. No role is easily defined.

These were people in touch with a transforming inner self. I found a greater articullation in myself as to what exactly I was feeling and thinking. Everyone I encountered was a willing listener and I felt that part of myself surfacing more. I was also taken back at how accepted my sense of humor was. I’ve spent a good bit of time in my life in places of uncomfortable adjustment, trying to fit into place with people who didn’t understand my sense of humor. I hadn’t realized how much this acceptence meant to me until I had it. I was instantly at ease and felt balanced between my spiritual, humourous and serious sides (these of course are not true divisions of self, just a convenient writer’s ploy at explaining something much more complicated.)

I realize now, sitting here, that I don’t think I will ever have the time to adequately describe everything about Lost Valley or the last weekend we spent there doing “Heart of Now”, that I wanted to. Nearly everyday after we left we have struggled to apply what we have learned to our lives. This trip has been a greater stress than either of us had anticipated. One of them being a lack of support and a lack of independant time. We spend every waking moment together out of necessity. We have no other friends or family to confide in or to turn to for support. We have no time to shut ourselves into our own space and reflect. I underestimated how much of a stress this would be on our relationship.

Most of our sentences about emotion start: “After we left Lost Valley…”. It’s like being brought back to earth after seeing heaven (there’s a Buffy reference there Kim should appreciate.) I know it would be easier to apply what we have learned if we had gone home to stability and to a support network of friends and family.

We continue to grow and are endlessly thankful to everyone at Lost Valley for their part in our transformation.
We will continue the dialogue and exploration at a better way to communicate with each other, and we will also continue to experiment with different places to apply what we’ve learned.